The Mary Sue Chronicles
by MissBloodRaven
Summary: Tales of the evilest of the evil, Mary Sue/Gary Stu, that are loose in Sofia-verse causing havoc to those characters who encounter them.


**Summary: **A maiden with "Mary Sue" dreams makes her way into Cedric's workshop to fling herself upon his minion, Wormwood.

**Author Note:** Insomnia strikes - CRACK FIC time!

**ooOooOooOoo**

An ordinary girl with dull brown hair stormed through the door of the sorcerer's workshop.

She squealed with delight when she saw Wormwood resting in his cage, "I have found you at last"

"Begone," hissed Cedric at the unwanted guest.

Cedric pondered why people didn't understand he just wanted to be left alone before he went back to his evil plotting. He was completely unaware this girl had ignored his request to leave. She had made her way to the wooden birdcage where Wormwood slept.

"Wormwood, O Wormwood," the girl chirped waking the bird from his slumber.

Wormwood stretched his wings and let out a grumpily caw at the young woman whom disturbed him.

"Oh good you're awake," smiled the girl. "My name is Raven and ... well I adore. No wait love you. Wormy!"

Cedric lost focus on his spell book when he hear the girl voice 'You're so handsome'. He turned to yell at her to leave again but she wasn't where he expected. The loony girl was at Wormy's cage not even glancing the royal sorcerer.

"Those feathers are so shiny and bluish-black color. It suits you quite well, " the girl with large gleaming eyes flirted with sleepy raven. "And you're beak, I bet you can tear your food apart with ease with it."

"And those talons, where do I start ... " giggled Raven as she reached in to touch Wormy's claw.

Once Wormwood was aware of the girl's intentions with him. He began to take a step back with every word that came out of the crazed girl mouth. He hit the back of the cage - He was trapped. He wished he wasn't all he wanted to do is fly far far away from the nut.

Cedric barged between the girl and the cage and yelled, "You can start by leaving."

Once again Raven ignored her true love's human master. She maneuver around Cedric and the birdcage to touch Wormwood again.

"Don't touch my bird," screamed Cedric at the ignorant girl.

"Ouch," cried the girl, "He snapped at me. Hey, why do I have a human hand?"

"Perhaps it's because you are human," Cedric stated the obvious

"But I am suppose to be a beautiful raven," rejoiced the brown haired girl. "Oh, yeah ... I changed myself to be a shape changer."

"What," the sorcerer said confused.

"If I am a shape changer, I can charm every man, woman, child and beast with my sensational looks," Raven said with a delightful grinned. "But even though all the world loves me I only have one true love, Wormwood!"

"That is ridiculous," Cedric huffed.

"Soon my love, Wormwood. I will understand you," the girl squealed with delight.

Wormy cawed in horror.

"Let me see I remember how I wrote the transformation process," the girl pondered out loud. "I do remember!"

Cedric glared at the girl as she squatted and crunch up the rest of her body. Cedric heard her begin muttered to herself. She looked constipated. The royal sorcerer hoped she was properly toilet trained. With how insane the girl appeared he was positive she wasn't trained. After two more agony minutes of her nonsense mumbling he could not bear it anymore.

"If you have an accident I'm not cleaning it," clearly stated Cedric.

"Silence!" the meditating girl shouted at Cedric, "Can't you see I am busy channeling my inner raven."

Cedric return to guard his beloved minion. After another five minutes she got out of the pose and looked extremely shocked.

"I forgot to write in my ability to shape change," Raven sighed in disappointment.

The brown hair maiden took out her notebook and jotted down the correction of adding shape-changing in.

"Good," Cedric screamed at the girl. "Now you can leave."

"Not yet," the girl stated. "I need to figure out what else need to be rewritten for absolute happiness of my lover, Wormywood and I. For starters we need to change your name to Ceedrick. It is so cute when Sofia calls you that."

"It's pronounced 'Said-rick" Cedric hissed. "Leave now!"

"I need to make you nicer to me."

"I'm a sorcerer with evil intentions I am suppose to be mean," Cedric grunted. "What I just witness I have even more of a reason to be mean to you!"

She ignored Cedric and smiled as she said, "I just got idea for the perfect happy ending - Wormwood and the most beautiful enchanting girl raven named Raven fly off into the sunset together."

That overly sappy happy ending almost made Cedric puke.

"See you later, Ceedrick," the ignorant girl said as she waived goodbye. "I'm off to see my beta reader. Don't fret I shall return when the revisions are done."

"I hope she gets lost and never returns," Cedric grumpily wished.

Wormy cawed in agreement with his master.

A minute later, the brunette girl stormed back into the sorcerer's workshop out of breath.

"Those stairs are a killer," the crazy girl stated. "I'm going to add an elevator."

"You're back already," sighed Cedric.

"Sadly, my beta reader is not that fast. I wish I was permanently back as much as you want me to be," replied the loony girl. "But I forgot something important."

"Really," mocked Cedric. "You forgot something, why am I not surprised."

"It would be the end of the world if I left without giving my true love a kiss before I go," stated the maiden named Raven.

Before Wormwood's master could stop her she was at the birdcage again, this time she opened it. But before the crazy girl could grab her lover he flew out of the cage scratching her with his talons on his way out. Wormy perched himself in the middle of the tallest bookshelf out of the girl's reach.

"Come down Wormy," Raven begged. "You can play catch me if you can game all you want once I can turn myself into a raven."

"Aren't you forgetting something," asked Cedric when he could not stand the presence of the girl any longer.

"Am I," questioned the brunette. "I tend to do that a lot."

"I can tell," the royal sorcerer blurted as he rolled his eyes. "You're beta reader is waiting for you."

Cedric was terrified of what would happen if insane girl returned after visiting this "beta-reader" person but the mention of the person seem to be the only way to get her out his workshop.

"She is, thanks for reminding me," the crazed girl thanked Cedric. "But I can't leave without giving Wormwood a kiss."

Cedric sighed.

"I guess a I will just have to blow my stubborn lover a kiss this time," stated the maiden before she blew Wormwood a kiss.

The moment the raven saw the action of the girl, he cawed in agony before he flopped on his back and played dead.

"Horrible joke, Wormy," pouted the loony girl. "My kisses aren't the kiss of death."

After the girl left the sorcerer's workshop once again, Cedric searched his books for a relocating spell.

"Enchancia is doomed if that girl remembers how to get back here," Cedric explained. "Precautions need to be taken. I will just have to relocate the entire kingdom."

Wormwood cawed at his master.

"Don't be ridiculous Wormy," the royal sorcerer replied. "It will not be easier for her to find us after we relocate."

The raven cawed again.

"Yes, yes, that playing dead was a good one," Cedric acknowledged. "She will probably forget that you ripped out her heart with playing dead. Curse that girl and her forgetful ways."


End file.
